I’ve been missing the Write 31 Days challenge, and the time I might have spent prepping for it this month. Honestly, I’ve been feeling a little sorry for myself over it. What the heck, self? I played in 2012 and 2018, and wish I’d done it more frequently. I mean, there’s always next year, right?
Until there isn’t.
I periodically go through these times when I start thinking things like, “How many people have I already seen for the last time? How many places have I already visited for the last time, and didn’t even know it?” That there will always be more time is so taken for granted. Part of that is because I still have to function in the day-to-day. If I worry too much about how many Halloweens are left in my life (40? 30? 1?), I’ll stop planning for the future and just go eat pumpkin pie and fried chicken and walk along the river marveling at birds until I run out of money or my pancreas gasps its last. I don’t have the kind of job that I would go to even if I didn’t need to work, you know?
I know the kind of job I would like to have, but don’t know how to get there. And I get hung up on the idea that, even if I start today, will there be enough time left to me to be able to master the job? What about enough to just get really good at it? Maybe that’s not the way to look at the situation.
Is there enough time left for me to enjoy the kind of job I’d like? Yep. I think so. I signed up for a class (just the one) to at least get my brain moving again. I don’t know if it will lead where I want, but maybe it will lead where I need. Any way I look at it, it will be a challenge. It will be a challenge to get to, to participate in, and to learn the material. Maybe accepting the challenge of it is what I really need to learn. That discomfort.
Oh, and I think I’ll try out Inktober this year. It’s meant to be for artists, but I think it’s an opportunity to combine fountain pen ink doodling and writing. I don’t feel like the 31 Days of 5 Minute Free Writes is a good fit for me, though it does look interesting. And I truly don’t have the money to spend for registering, though I’m sure it’s worth every penny.
Are you writing/drawing/crafting/photographing this October as part of a challenge? My writing challenge last year, 31 Posts of Nope, was some of the most fun I’ve had writing.
PS. Speaking of challenges. I’m totally going to be able to pay all my bills this month, with three whole dollars left over!! I won’t be scrambling to scrape something together. My divorce was final one year ago yesterday, and this is the first month I can say that.